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Archive for the ‘Gaming’ Category

Green Welling LLP Wii’s on Nintendo

In Gaming on December 19, 2006 at 9:56 pm

Looks like the big N has gotten slapped with a class action lawsuit for thsoe defective Wii-motes.  In the recently filed lawsuit, GWLLP claims “Nintendo’s failure to include a remote that is free from defects” is, naturally a “breach of Nintendo’s own product warranty.”

I refer you yet again to the simple knowledge that a) it expressly says to use moderate, subtle movements and b) said people are not following any of the given directions/safety precautions.  Most importantly, the claim implies the wrist strap is breaking while the Wii-mote is still firmly in the player’s hand.

What the fuck?!?!  You mean I can swing my wrist with the force to snap a wrist strap? While we’re sueing people for defective equipment, what about all those X-Box 360’s that broke down and died anywhere from after purchase to 6 months later? Not only was that a (theoretically) similar situation, but Nintendo has been a lot quicker to try and fix the problem.

This whole thing is fucking ridiculous.  The morons who have managed to get their hands on their Wii have videotaped themselves wildly swinging the damn thing about, striking objects and people.  Nintendo, who have tried to do something new, innovative, and unique, are getting fucked while Sony and Microsoft churn out the same old shit for 2-3 times the price.  And the entire time, its gamers like you and I who are footing the bill for this insanity.

I’ll buy a Wii when I can afford it.  But as for the other swill, fuck you.  My PS2 and X-Box 1 have more than enough of the same godawful crap you’re pushing year in and year out to keep me occupied until your current consoles come up with something to entertain me, and fuck everyone of you who are siding against Nintendo.  This is what’s going to kill the gaming industry.

Big N Recalls Wii’s

In Gaming on December 15, 2006 at 11:13 am

Source: Yahoo! News

Looks like Nintendo is having to recall a bunch of Wii-mote’s after the wrist straps designed to keep the controller attached to your person started snapping.

The beauty of the “flying wii-mote”, said to injure persons, tvs, and fragile glass objects?  Its done by people who are doing the exact opposite of what the Wii-manual (see how I Wii’d on everything?) by flailing their arms around like a madman, and doing so in close vicinity of other objects and/or people.

For fuck’s sake, there is a big damn diagram with giant red arrows depicting a person standing in the open, saying in big letters to make sure no one or nothing is around you while you play.  It also says (and I’ve played these things, I know this is true) that you don’t need to flail; the system will detect the smallest of movements.  Hell, even the sarcastic folks over at Penny Arcade were saying that one when the system came out.

So, in a time when the console war rages on and there are nothing but shortages, in a time when Christmas is fast approaching and people are still (lets face it, foolishly) trying to find a Nintendo Wii, the big N is forced to recall the system because people are idiots?  Any chance we can recall the people who bought the system?

If you own a Wii, please be careful.  And Nintendo, maybe this should be a sign?  The Wizard just came out on DVD, maybe this is the perfect time to bring back that cherished 8-bit nostalgia, the Power Glove?  It would certainly solve the flying Wii-mote problems.  Until, of course, some gang member decided to wear said Power Glove on a series of thefts. 

But that’s a story for next-next gen.

Spoilery Bits To GamePro: Please Stop Sucking Sony’s…

In Gaming on December 12, 2006 at 5:10 am

Back in the mid-to-late 90s, I was a huge fan of the videogame publication GamePro, and to be honest, some of my fondest memories of the magazine back when folks like Scary Larry still wrote for it. However, when I got the newest issue in the mail recently, I have to say, I’m quite concerned that GamePro is officially taking the love of the Sony cock too far.

Not exactly sure why they want to invest so much love in the $600 PS3 anyways, since Sony plans to release a PlayStation 4 in 2010.

The new GamePro lists “14 Things You Need To Know” about the Sony Playstation three. Hit the MORE link and I’m gonna throw in my $0.02 on a few of said things… Read the rest of this entry »